Tuesday, December 13, 2016

Borrowed Happiness

So hear me out. Sometimes you life sucks and absolutely nothing is good. You have had a shit year, you don't have a job and if you do it's the pits, your love life is worse than your job scene, you are far away from every one you love, and you are don't really have a home. And its totally reasonable to be absolutely depressed and cynical because good things are avoiding you like the plague.

Even if every single of those things are happening to me and my life totally is the dumps, I am happy. This is my way of dealing with unhappiness this year. I am borrowing happiness from those around me. While I have nothing to be happy for, those around me do and that just makes me feel fantastic. My best friend in the whole world is getting married and that single handedly has made the universally accepted trash year 2016 worth it. Not just one, but 4 more of my closes friends have decided to seal the deal in the coming year and their happiness makes me ecstatic. Their happiness is the mdma thats keeping me going. It makes me see that while everything terrible can happen to mankind, the most beautiful thing is still our one redeeming quality. That we can love someone with all our heart and be fearless and declare it to the rest of the world.

I am borrowing some happiness from my other best friend and sister both of whom got jobs of their dreams. They are truly deserving of everything they are getting and I am so grateful for it. I want them to enjoy every second of what they are doing. I am borrowing joy from my other sister who found out she is pregnant and her radiating happiness makes me glow too. I am borrowing it from my little niece who just makes my day with her perfect laughter. She makes this year so totally worth it.

I am taking it from those who are accomplishing their goals and falling in love and making decisions like total badasses that they are.

I am borrowing it from movies and from music and from books. Thats exactly what they are there for. Thank you all of you. I'm not going to let this year beat me, because goddamnit 2017 will be spectacular. It has to be. And until things turn around, I am going to be relentlessly cheerful. Because I'm bored of being bummed.